Somehow, this got lost on here.

Blog entry April 23, 2019

I have been on a “wait” list. Every time I either go through an illness or a surgery, somehow, I get “BE still and know that I am God” sent to me. Since October 2018, I have been “waiting” to see what I have. I went to my new GP complaining that the right side of my throat was swollen and hurt. I told him that I didn’t have the mumps. He ordered a blood test to rule that out. he also sent me for an ultrasound on my neck. The ultrasound resulted in a CT scan which showed that I had a nodule or cyst on the right side of my throat. The ultrasound had said I had them bilaterally, however after a second Ct scan, I only have it on the right side. In December 2018, I went for a biopsy. In January of 2019, I received the results. The specialist had said it was benign but inconclusive- meaning the doctor didn’t get enough cells to determine whether it was benign. I have had a blood test and a second Ct scan. The nodule has grown since the last one. I go for another biopsy (which I asked for in the first place as I don’t want surgery if it is benign). I currently do not have a date for the second biopsy, so I wait and continue to trust that God has this. I must say that I have had a peace about this whole thing throughout the waiting. So, I will be still and wait. There are times I wish I could get it over with and then I think of all the things I still need to do. It reminds me to get things in order. We do not know when it is “our” time to leave this earth. I am also reminded to be ready for the time God needs to take me away from this earth. I want everyone to know of God and to invite Him in and have a relationship with Him.

So I wait for you,

So I wait for you,

I’m falling on my knees,

Offering all of me,                                                       

Jesus, you’re all I’ve waited for.

Another song or chorus written by my friend, Karyn Sunderland;

Jesus, let me sit at your feet

Jesus, let me sit at your feet

Let me wash Your Holy precious feet with my broken anguish tears;

Let me come to You with all my pain and simply offer You my life again.

Jesus, let me sit at Your feet.

An update, I have had surgery to remove the cyst/tumor of the paratoid gland (the whole gland was removed), June 3rd, 2020. I continue to have numbness on the right ear and have had different sensations of pain during the healing. The tumor was benign by the way.

These are some thoughts I have been reading from a book called Having a Mary Spirit- Allowing God to Change Us from the Inside Out -Joanne Weaver (such an inspiring book!);

"For in His mercy, our Heavenly Father does not leave us to ourselves. He woos us. With open arms, He lovingly draws us to Himself- for He wants a people to call His own."

(Me) God loves us more than we know or imagine.

The author talks about wrestling and she says this: “So aren’t you glad we have the best tag-team partner of all? Just when we think we can’t make it, just when we feel helplessly pinned down by some sin or compromise, the Lord calls from outside the ring, “Can I give you a hand?”

(me) I love this. The Lord wants to help us at every turn, yet we protest. Why?

She also says this; “We don’t have to squirm and scramble to find Him; we simply have to admit our need. With our asking, Jesus comes—and then all hell breaks loose. Literally. The hopeless, helpless, paralyzed feeling lifts as we see the King of the universe rushing to our aid to rescue us from out fiercest competitor, our most dangerous adversary. Ourselves.”

Me) Isn’t that true? We are our own worst enemy? We are destructive to ourselves, thwarting an abundant life, a happy life, enjoying what God has given us. Oh, we need Him but, yet we reject Him.

“But we have to invite Him. We have to call Him into the ring. That’s definitely a place to start. But getting help we need is a bit more complicated than just calling our for it. For if we ever hope to have real victory over (Me)US (the author says Flesh Woman), we must give Jesus the right to rule our lives.”

(Me) Amen. I don’t know about you but I need the Saviour to help me on my daily journey. Without Him, I would be lost, depraved and just plain miserable!

I don’t want to preach to you. You may have other beliefs, but I know that my Redeemer lives and I am trying to walk in His way. whatever comes, God's got this! 

A song I love: My Redeemer Lives- Nicole C. Mullen;

“Who taught the sun where to stand in the morning

and who taught the ocean you can only come this far

and who showed the moon where to hide til evening

whose words alone can catch a falling star?

Well, I know my Redeemer lives,

I know my redeemer lives,

All of creation testifies,

This life within me cries,

I know my Redeemer lives,

The very same god that spins things in orbit

Runs to the weary ,the worn and the weak,

And the same gentle hands

That hold me when I’m broken

They conquer death to being me victory

Now I know that my Redeemer lives,

I know that my Redeemer lives

 Let all creation testify

Let this life within me cry

I know my Redeemer lives

He lives to take away my shame and He lives forever I’ll proclaim

That the payment for my sin

Was the precious life He gave

But now He’s alive and there’s an empty grave

And I know my Redeemer lives

I know my redeemer lives

Let all creation testify

That this life within me cry

I know that my Redeemer lives

Because I can face tomorrow

He lives, I know, I know, I know.

He lives!

Blessings,

Sharon Rose

      Hi, I haven't posted for a long while. I had have many thoughts. Recently we just celebrated Canadian Thanksgiving. At the most recent Women's Bible study, we were challenged to ponder our lives and the things we have received and how that has changed the way we are thankful.
      When asked at the Bible study what we were thankful for, I honestly could not think of anything, yet I have much to be thankful for.
      I have had an interesting late Spring and Summer and worry into the Fall. In January we (my husband and I) decided to buy a flight to Toronto to surprise his mom and brother. In May, my husband's brother passed away. My husband, seemingly a strong man emotionally, went back to help his mom with the funeral, the papers, and to help his mom get through this. He ended up being away for two weeks. During this whole time, my husband did not break down or get "emotional". He stayed strong for his mom. When he came back home, he was not the same. He had trouble being able to go back to work and ended up taking more time off work.  He still did not show signs of grieving for his brother. Instead, he showed signs of anger. He did eventually go back to work but for a short time until his vacation. We still had those tickets to go to Toronto to see his mom. That was at the end of July. We visited with my brother and his family and had a lovely time. When we went to see my husband's mom, we coped with her having had a fall and attempting to have some sort of a nice time with her. It was very difficult. She had fallen the Sunday before we came and had bruises under both eyes. I watched her carefully and noticed that she had forgotten her medication and would double up on it, causing her to become disorientated and fall. She couldn't go out for long periods of time nor eat much. While we were there, we managed to get a friend look in on her while we were here in BC. This friend has become very dear to our hearts and is a good friend of my mother-in-law. I am thankful for her. She and her husband spend time with my mother-in-law, go and get her groceries, and phone her to check in on her.
     When we got back from our "vacation", I had a couple of health appointments. One was a mammogram on my birthday! What a birthday present! Anyways, after the procedure, I was phoned the following week to come in for further tests. I went for further tests, which was another mammogram. They really need to come up with something as painful for men! Seriously! The second mammogram confirmed what they had found on the first one-I had calcifications on one of my breasts. The nurse explained everything to me. She explained that I would have to come for a biopsy. I walked away a little numb. I am a believer in Jesus Christ and I immediately prayed. I am also a worrier. I explained to God that I was a worrier and to take that away any worry this biopsy would cause. I have to say while I waited for the appointment, I was at peace and I did not worry. I went to the biopsy appointment. Everything was thoroughly explained to me before the procedure. I will not go into detail as to what the technicians exactly do and what the doctor does during this procedure. It is very invasive. I was able to go to a Women's conference that night and during the weekend post the biopsy. I was indeed surprised as to how much resilience I had! I was indeed thankful for the experience I had at the Women's conference. The singing lifted my soul, the speaker was excellent and her words (words from God) touched my heart. The women who came fellowshipped and it was great to connect with women I have met over the years. It was like a grand re-union! I was indeed blessed and very thankful! Well, this week I went to the doctor's office to find out the results only to find that they haven't come in. I was dismayed. While in the doctor's office, I became very nervous which was put to rest when there were no results to have. Today, I had pain under the area where I had the biopsy and so I went back to the doctor's. The doctor thinks the pain is in  the muscle tissue and will go away. I also did not feel well, I think it was from the anxiousness I have over this whole situation. Then the doctor told me he had phoned the pathologist. The doctor told me that the biopsy was benign! I at first said some glib remark as to going through this procedure for nothing but the doctor assured me I did not go through it for nothing but for prevention. The result was good, I should be happy! I did say that that was good news. The doctor agreed. It is good news. I am very thankful!
     We have so much to be thankful for. One thing I am thankful for is life! I am glad to be alive, well and able to continue on with life hopefully in God's will.
     I think we need to be thankful to God. He sustains us, gives us life. Yes, death is a part of life and there will be a day that we all go through that, but I think we should embrace life and all that it holds.
     "Be full of joy always because you belong to the Lord. Again, I say, be full of joy!" Phillipians 4:4 NLT

Miracles can happen!

I recently wrote about what has been happening to my body (face and right side of body) in the last post. I am so happy to say that the neurologist has ruled out that I didn't have a stroke and today it was confirmed by the eye specialist. I explained to him what has happened since January 2013 and what I described to him sounded so much like a stroke. He looked into my eyes to check the nerves at the back of the eye and he said that there was no sign of a stroke. He explained that the numbness in my face around the eye is coming from the back of the brain mid section. I also do have more sight in my "bad" eye that has an ocular motor issue (stabimus-a lazy eye). The eye specialist said that amblyopia (dimness of sight) can change as we age. Although I cannot read words with it, I can see better out of it and have more field of vision! And, my pressures (glaucoma) are down! Miracles can happen! A few more tests to be done (I had a holter monitor and the readings will go back to my doctor and I have to go for an eco-cardiogram. I am sure these tests will turn out fine as well). So excited that I can see with both eyes, but I do have to get use to this! It is a little freaky.

      So many thoughts, where to start. I keep saying I will post more often. It has been two years since the last post!
      January of this year has been interesting and thought provoking to say the least.
      In December, my husband and I attended two funerals and it got me thinking that I should start getting healthier. I had already in the previous year, attended Healthy Transformations, a session of bible studies with a special guest who has changed my life considerably! Healthy Transformations also had an exercise conponent to it as well. I attended the bible study every week, I think I missed a couple of studies-they were on transforming our thinking to be a more healthy person both in body, mind and soul through pastor Rick Warren, through the Daniel Plan. I attended the exercise as much as I could. I saw a change in our leader (previous Corps officer in our church). She had lost a considerable amount of weight! I thought wow, if she can do it so can I. I started in December 2012 and to date I have lost 13 pounds. Now, I want to go back and tell you what happened to me in January 2013.
      At the end of the first week of January I became ill with a flu. by January 16th, the right side of my face went numb right down to my lip. My ear felt numb also. I went to the doctor to have him check my ear to see if I had an ear infection. I did not. Then I got severe pain into my teeth on the right side of my mouth and into my jaw. I went to the dentist and he could not determine at the time if there was anything wrong with my teeth. The pain went down my neck and into my shoulder and down the right arm into the fingers. My right eye blacked out for minutes. I went back to the doctor at the request of the staff at work as they thought I was having a stroke! I went to my doctor and he at first said I could have had a stroke but then he said he didn't think I was having one! That weekend, January 26th, I went to see the special guest from our bible study, a naturopath Dr. Alana Polo. I had seen her three times previously for a diet to help control my IBS and my diabetes and to lose some weight. When I told her the symptoms I was having, she suggested I go straight to the hospital and get the stroke ruled out. So instead of going for a massage (that is how I was relieving the pain in my neck), I went to the hospital. I spent four hours there getting checked out to see if I had had a stroke. I tell you, when you go into the hospital with possible symptoms of a stroke, the nurses and doctors move and fast! The student doctor did some tests and the ER doctor did tests and I had a CT scan that day. Good news, the CT scan came back normal, so I am "normal". The following Monday, January 28th, I had an ultrasound on the arteries in my neck. That came back clear, meaning there was no sign of a stroke. The neurologist confirmed that he didn't think I had had a stroke. Good news! However, the numbness in my face continued. The pain in my jaw and neck were still there. I had another appointment with the dentist for a cleaning in late February and the dentist thought I needed a root canal done when in January he couldn't find anything wrong with my teeth. I have been to the massage therapist and a new chiropractor (for a couple of visits as the neurologist scared me when he asked if I had had my neck maniplulated, which I have done all the time from my previous chiropractor). The new chiropractor used a different technique and he said that neck maniplulation does not cause a stroke. I have had the root canal done and am waiting a week to have it filled. I continue with the massage and have gone to my previous chiropractor. He did a maniplulation on my neck with a tool he uses and I can now turn my head quite considerably. the two chiropractors and the massage therapist say they think it is the muscles in my neck, they are very tight. I have been to the diabetic doctor and my sugars are down and my blood pressure also. During all this, I also thought I was having an allergic reaction to almonds. I have been to an allergist and it turns out that my blood pressure medication was the culprit at making my tongue swell and difficulty swallowing. My naturopath has taken me off my blood pressure medication (I needed to renew it anyway) and now I am taking COQ10 and magnesium with fish oils to keep my blood pressure even. I still have numbness around the eye but another wierd thing is that since I have lost some weight, I have more vision in that eye (I have stabimus-a lazy eye in the right eye).

      I consider the new vision in my eye and the lower blood sugars and lower blood pressure miracles from God, I know some of you will say it is because I am following a healthy diet and yes, that is partly true but I do believe without the Lord's help (I have no will power when it comes to sweets and even some salty foods), I couldm't get to where I am right now. It is still a struggle, as I still crave sweet things and the numbness has not gone away. I am praying that the Lord will help me through these struggles.

     I am reminded of two scriptures that have helped me to keep my focus; "Be still and know that I am God", "They that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength, they will mount up with wings as eagles." And 1 Chronicles 16:29-36. Give thanks to the Lord, his love endures forever! Psalms 40:2 says that the Lord lifted me out of the miry clay, out of the pit of despair. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along."

       May the Lord lift you out of the despair you may face and may He heal you from all your infirmities.

Blessings

Thanksgiving- what are you thankful for?
We have so much to be thankful for. We have freedom in Canada to choose our religion and keep our faith. We have freedom to not be in a war or disagreement over how our government rules and/or treats its subjects. We have the freedom to vote-in some countries, many put their life in jeopardy just to do this! Women have the freedom to speak and go about their daily business without fear of a man killing them for being out in public. We somewhat take care of those who are orphaned, widowed, and without a home, clothes, and food. Yes, there are still those who are homeless, wandering the streets, without a roof over their heads, food in their stomachs. There are many in third world countries that do not have these necessessities everyday!
Jesus says, "For I was hungry and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home, I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me". Matthew 25:35,36. "I tell you the truth, when you did it to the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing this to me". Matt. 25:40
Jesus goes on to say to those who do not do this they will be cursed into the eternal lake of fire (vs. 41) When you refuse to help the least of us, you are refusing to help Jesus.
Yes, we have so much to be thankful for. Let us help our fellow man.

Give thanks with a grateful heart,
Give thanks to the holy one,
Give thanks because He's given
Jesus Christ His son,(x2)
And now let the weak say I am poor,
Let the poor say I am rich
because of what the Lord has done for us,(x2)
Give thanks, give thanks.

HI, I attended a Women of Faith conference on the weekend. The special guest was Liz Curtis Higgs. What a wonderful speaker and funny! She spoke about the grace that God gives us, free of course, because He loves us so. It doesn't matter what we do, He still loves us. He gives us so many chances to choose Him!

After such a wonderful weekend, today was a particularly difficult day for my son. One of his friends was found dead in a apartment. We do not know the circumstance in which he died, but we know he knew the Lord. Prayers are being lifted right now for this yound man's family, friends, co-workers, aquaintances and pastor.

I am reminded of a song we sing, Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, I once was lost but now am found....His grace it covers me, it covers me.

His grace can cover you. Allow God to touch you today.

Blessings

The world is a beautiful place. We have just returned from Hawaii. I was surprised that parts of Maui and Kawai are very wet, just like BC! They actually get more rain, although right now they are in a drought. I learned many things about Hawaii. A very beautiful place! Mahalo.

Well, my friend has gone to be with the Lord. We say in the Salvation Army that the person has been "promoted to glory". She always gave unto others, always had an encouraging word, a smile, a hug. She will be missed but I know that I will see her again.

Another friend from along time ago has also passed away. It makes you think of your life and if you had any impact on anyone's life. We are going to his funeral today and to celebrate his life.

Just a few more weary days and then, I'll fly away.
to a land where joy will never end, I'll fly away.
I'llvfly away, oh Glory, I'll fly away
When I die, Hallelujah by and by, I'll fly away

May you know that you are in His hands,
whatever the future holds, you're in His hands.

Death

Death

I had entitled my blog page Life Lessons from Grace and Fellowship because I learn something about life every day. The other day we (my husband and myself) went to see a friend who is dying. I hardly recognized her. She looked like a man. As I got closer to her bed, I realized her body had changed. She was almost a skeleton, sleeping in her bed. I did not want to wake her but I wanted her to know we had come to visit her. I brushed her arm and she woke up. I talked to her, read her a few poems and sang to her the 23 Psalm. She loved it. You could see how weak she was. I told her that God was preparing her a room in His mansion and that soon, she would be with Him. She rejoiced in this fact. We prayed over her, gave her hugs and told her that we would see her again.

It was so difficult to see our friend the way she was in her bed. So frail and hardly recognizable. It was difficult to talk with her, knowing she was going to die soon. The tears were not held back. I know that she will be missed. I will see her again. Hallelujah!

I was going to blog about death. Morbid to say the least. Not for some.
Some believe that death is final. It is in this earthly realm, however, some believe that death is a beginning to a new life beyond the grave. Some believe that if you have not been a good or nice person in this life, you would come back as something less than that of a human such as a dog or a bug. Some believe that if you were a murderer, a thief, or someone who committed a crime that you would come back as something at a lower status. Some believe that if we suffer here on earth, we will be at peace when we die.
I believe that when we die we do embark on a life beyond the grave. You see if you believe in Jesus Christ, He promises you to have eternal life with Him when we die. He also promises us that there will be no more weeping, no more pain, no more death, no more mourning, no more curse. rev. 21:4; 22:3 (NIV- Paraphrased by me).

We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep...And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words. 1 Thessalonians 4:14-15, 17-18. NIV

"I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this? John 11:25,26. NIV

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms, if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going." John 14: 1-4 NIV

The picture I put on my blog is of our dog, Ziggy. His full name is Zigfreed Ziopholas. He is supposebly to be a knight in a game. No, he is not Italian, he is a Pomeranian, Tebetan, Spaniel.
Ziggy has a mischievious personality. He goes into the bedroom and gets onto the bed and snatches receipts in a basket that are approximately 2 feet from the bed! He gets into the clean laundry and snatches the pillow cases. He snatches underwear, socks, paper, slippers. He chews on all these items. He use to chew cords! He is 2 years old and still has puppy in him. He had been to training school and only now does he come when you call him. We had a difficult time training him to pee outside. My son has successfully trained Ziggy to go outside! Yeh! Even though, it seems that Ziggy does not like my son, he listens to him. Ziggy can be a brat but we all love him. He always comes to you when you come home, waggy his tail and wanting to lick you. He has learned to give me high-fives. Ziggy's love is very affectionate, unconditional.

God's love is unconditional. He loves us no matter what we do or say. He is always there to pick us up when we fall or when we get hurt. He loves us when we are happy, when we are sad, angry, anxious, not knowing where to turn. He loves us through the trees, the flowers, the mountains, the beauty all around us. He loves us through giving us people in our lives who help us through difficult times. He wants us to love him also.

Ephesians 3:16-18 says; "I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through His spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have the power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ."

Renovations

Renovations! How marvelous, yet frustrating. We recently had our whole house renovated. We started with the basement and then decided that we wanted the upstairs done. We decided to hire a contractor. He was honest, efficient and did an excellant job! Now for the unpacking. We always had to stay one step ahead of the contractor as he did one room at a time. This was okay until everything was in a box. We couldn't find anything! Once the kitchen in the basement was done, we could at least cook in that but where was the kitchen items? MMM....

At times, our lives are a mess and we ask God to come in and clean up the mess. To make it over anew. Jesus does that, if we let him. He comes in to dine with us, to clean up the mess, to renovate our hearts. He makes us a new creature in Christ. He unpacks the boxes, throws out the junk, cleans the cob-webs and gives us new lives.

Our part? To follow Him, to fellowship with believers, to pray, to read from His word. To have faith and rely on Him for everything.

Jesus can renovate your heart if you let Him in. All you have to do is ask.

"Put off your old self...to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on a new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." Ephesians 4:24, 25.