Somehow, this got lost on here.

Blog entry April 23, 2019

I have been on a “wait” list. Every time I either go through an illness or a surgery, somehow, I get “BE still and know that I am God” sent to me. Since October 2018, I have been “waiting” to see what I have. I went to my new GP complaining that the right side of my throat was swollen and hurt. I told him that I didn’t have the mumps. He ordered a blood test to rule that out. he also sent me for an ultrasound on my neck. The ultrasound resulted in a CT scan which showed that I had a nodule or cyst on the right side of my throat. The ultrasound had said I had them bilaterally, however after a second Ct scan, I only have it on the right side. In December 2018, I went for a biopsy. In January of 2019, I received the results. The specialist had said it was benign but inconclusive- meaning the doctor didn’t get enough cells to determine whether it was benign. I have had a blood test and a second Ct scan. The nodule has grown since the last one. I go for another biopsy (which I asked for in the first place as I don’t want surgery if it is benign). I currently do not have a date for the second biopsy, so I wait and continue to trust that God has this. I must say that I have had a peace about this whole thing throughout the waiting. So, I will be still and wait. There are times I wish I could get it over with and then I think of all the things I still need to do. It reminds me to get things in order. We do not know when it is “our” time to leave this earth. I am also reminded to be ready for the time God needs to take me away from this earth. I want everyone to know of God and to invite Him in and have a relationship with Him.

So I wait for you,

So I wait for you,

I’m falling on my knees,

Offering all of me,                                                       

Jesus, you’re all I’ve waited for.

Another song or chorus written by my friend, Karyn Sunderland;

Jesus, let me sit at your feet

Jesus, let me sit at your feet

Let me wash Your Holy precious feet with my broken anguish tears;

Let me come to You with all my pain and simply offer You my life again.

Jesus, let me sit at Your feet.

An update, I have had surgery to remove the cyst/tumor of the paratoid gland (the whole gland was removed), June 3rd, 2020. I continue to have numbness on the right ear and have had different sensations of pain during the healing. The tumor was benign by the way.

These are some thoughts I have been reading from a book called Having a Mary Spirit- Allowing God to Change Us from the Inside Out -Joanne Weaver (such an inspiring book!);

"For in His mercy, our Heavenly Father does not leave us to ourselves. He woos us. With open arms, He lovingly draws us to Himself- for He wants a people to call His own."

(Me) God loves us more than we know or imagine.

The author talks about wrestling and she says this: “So aren’t you glad we have the best tag-team partner of all? Just when we think we can’t make it, just when we feel helplessly pinned down by some sin or compromise, the Lord calls from outside the ring, “Can I give you a hand?”

(me) I love this. The Lord wants to help us at every turn, yet we protest. Why?

She also says this; “We don’t have to squirm and scramble to find Him; we simply have to admit our need. With our asking, Jesus comes—and then all hell breaks loose. Literally. The hopeless, helpless, paralyzed feeling lifts as we see the King of the universe rushing to our aid to rescue us from out fiercest competitor, our most dangerous adversary. Ourselves.”

Me) Isn’t that true? We are our own worst enemy? We are destructive to ourselves, thwarting an abundant life, a happy life, enjoying what God has given us. Oh, we need Him but, yet we reject Him.

“But we have to invite Him. We have to call Him into the ring. That’s definitely a place to start. But getting help we need is a bit more complicated than just calling our for it. For if we ever hope to have real victory over (Me)US (the author says Flesh Woman), we must give Jesus the right to rule our lives.”

(Me) Amen. I don’t know about you but I need the Saviour to help me on my daily journey. Without Him, I would be lost, depraved and just plain miserable!

I don’t want to preach to you. You may have other beliefs, but I know that my Redeemer lives and I am trying to walk in His way. whatever comes, God's got this! 

A song I love: My Redeemer Lives- Nicole C. Mullen;

“Who taught the sun where to stand in the morning

and who taught the ocean you can only come this far

and who showed the moon where to hide til evening

whose words alone can catch a falling star?

Well, I know my Redeemer lives,

I know my redeemer lives,

All of creation testifies,

This life within me cries,

I know my Redeemer lives,

The very same god that spins things in orbit

Runs to the weary ,the worn and the weak,

And the same gentle hands

That hold me when I’m broken

They conquer death to being me victory

Now I know that my Redeemer lives,

I know that my Redeemer lives

 Let all creation testify

Let this life within me cry

I know my Redeemer lives

He lives to take away my shame and He lives forever I’ll proclaim

That the payment for my sin

Was the precious life He gave

But now He’s alive and there’s an empty grave

And I know my Redeemer lives

I know my redeemer lives

Let all creation testify

That this life within me cry

I know that my Redeemer lives

Because I can face tomorrow

He lives, I know, I know, I know.

He lives!

Blessings,

Sharon Rose